i've decided i'm going to start working out.. ever since i went into the hospital at the beginning of the year i completely stopped going to the gym.. and since then have packed on some pounds.. makes me sad. i think i maybe have gained five to ten pounds back.. i can still fit into my pants but they are getting to be tiiiiiiight. not good. :(

i talked to jason about it tonight.. and we were trying to think of ways to motivate me to go.. he came up with a few ideas that i quickly shot down. i thought they would depress me instead of motivate me to go because they were way too serious. for example, he said that since my goal weight is like 120 that he wouldn't propose to me until i get there.. i told him no way.. i would just get frustrated and depressed and cranky.. soooooo we decided that we needed to split it up into some small rewards.. every five pounds i lose i get some kind of makeup thing that i want.. like a lip gloss or eyeshadow or something! woot! and then when i get to my ideal weight he is going to take me to get me a bunch of makeup for reaching my goal. sounds good to me. and it isn't so serious that i'll be constantly worrying and stressing over whether i've gained a pound or whatever. i duno.. sounds good to me though.. lol i need to start planning out my rewards and what i'm going to get! weee!

well i'm tired so i'm going to get in my jammies.. get into bed... and read my book! :) night all.. <33